"Cold hard bitch, just a kiss on the lips..."
2004-02-02 | 12:54 p.m.

How old do you have to be before you stop getting jealous of your siblings?

The people at Miss Teen Canada are just fawning over my sister, really urging her to get in to next year's competition. With personalized e-mails and shit. What, do we have people watching our house or something? Yeah, I'm jealous! I'm tired of being the smaller, darker, wilder, all around less perfect version of her. Even more than you're tired of hearing about it.

Save yourself the finger-energy and don't go off on the whole "So what if she does some stupid pageant, you'll be on the other side of the world!" thing. Because eventually I'll have to come home to a beauty queen sister, or at the very least, a sister who is capable of becoming a beauty queen while I sit around reading books and going to school.

Katie, fuck you for being born a blonde.

Does anybody want to place advance orders on "I know the diarist sister of Miss Teen Canada" t-shirts and bumper stickers? I'm hoping to put myself through university.

-S

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