Ellie-phant
2003-08-04 | 12:37 a.m.

Today was FANTASTIC!

Last night my very gay uncle Greg, the one that works on all the killer movies, and my Aunt Michelle, who thinks the sun shines out of my ass, slept over. We stayed up way too late watching Breakfast at Tiffany's. My Uncle loved it and he's quite the conniseur.

I spelled that shit wrong.

Today we went to Steph & Gene's baby shower. It was way too much fucking fun. Greg had all these killer decorations from a scene in this new movie, "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen." Lindsay Lohan of The Parent Trap is in it. She's a huge bitch in real life, by the way. Everyone on set hates her primadonna antics.

But that's beside the point. The decorations were from a scene at a rock star's house. Also, I got a bunch of old bartending shit from "Cocktail". Remember? The Tom Cruise movie? Sweet.

Um, long story short, I met my Great Aunt Ellie and she's fucking LEGENDARY. She answers the door at 68 in a low cut white polyester shirt, black flairs and an 18-Karat gold lightning bolt necklace. It was love at first sight. She's classy and firey and incredibly intelligent, one of the most honest and hilarious people I've ever met. I can't wait to hang out with her again. My relatives are the shit.

My Aunt invited me to Australia in a couple days. I had to decline to save for my airfare on my next trip but still, cool eh?

Um, what else. My crazy Aunt Ellie blew me away with her ability to entertain. She opened the party with a great speech about where to smoke and pee and make out. She got my vote when she walked by my sister, who was on her COMPUTER talking to her FRIENDS on ICQ. At a baby shower. Selfish brat. And Ellie goes "HEY, don't look at my porn..."

Claaaaaaaaassic.

I wandered around the neighbourhood. I talked to some ghetto children across the street playing with some kittens that couldn't have been more than 2 weeks old. An insane cat lady came over between rounds at the bingo hall and confiscated the fucking cats! Not only that, but she bitched at these poor kids right in front of me, telling them that they were "really stupid for taking the cats away from their mother!" Come on, what are they gonna say? "I'm SEVEN, lady, I like soft kittens. Fist yourself."

I can't really think of anything else. I wore cool new underwear today, and I felt really good about myself. My tattoo is looking beautiful, despite my hiding it under a scarf from my parents. I got a good look at it in all the mirrors in Ellie and John's bathroom and it looks gorgeous now. The detail of the flames is really delicate, although it's a little scabby. I WILL wear sunscreen on it at the beach tomorrow!

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little excited because Marissa is setting me up with a guy.

Just when we pulled in from the party in Windsor, Kaitlyn pulls in to my driveway, bearing goat cheese (my mom cooks that stuff like woah) and plans for this eve. The girls and I drove around for a few hours, ate too much junk food, honked at strippers, the norm.

Okay, so... that's it! No more diary entries ever! Ha, just kidding. For tonight. Maybe.

-S

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